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Are
there any Guidelines to The Mandingo Club Swing
Parties?
In
order to keep things enjoyable for those who
attend our parties, we do have some guidelines
that we expect all of our members, as consenting
adults, to abide by:
The
Golden Rule: “NO
Means NO.” Anyone (yourself included) may say
“NO” at any time for any reason, without
further explanation. Experience has taught most
people that everybody is not right for
everybody. Saying “No” should be done with a
simple “No, thank you.” Never give an
explanation because that is what usually causes
problems and hurt feelings. Don't forget that
people's attitudes can change with time and the
situation. Who knows? Maybe sometime in the
future you may meet again with a different
outcome.
Be
Courteous. Be
aware that this is a lifestyle full of
insecurities, uncertainties and fears.
Courteously is how we all want to be treated –
with kindness, thoughtfulness, understanding,
and sensitivity. In essence, courtesy is our
treating people the way we ourselves want to be
treated.
Be
Friendly. Whether
or not you are personally interested in being
with someone be polite. You never know, you may
share many other interests or you may meet that
person again, and they may introduce you to
someone with whom you ARE compatible and wish to
share time. After all, this is a party!!!
Besides, you don't want to be rude or judgmental
because you wouldn't want it to happen to you.
Relax
and Get Acquainted.
Once
you have become familiar with the surroundings
and host/hostess, try to become as at ease as
you would be at any other social gathering.
Don't hesitate to introduce yourselves to other
people. You'll find them eager to welcome you
and to help you blend into their circle of
sincere camaraderie.
Respect
Others Feelings. Beware,
not everyone is comfortable in all situations.
Keep your eyes open for signs that your partner,
as well as others, are relaxed and enjoying
themselves. If someone is not comfortable, try
helping him or her over the rough spots. If it
is obvious that things are not working out,
remain polite and courteous; and alert the host.
Keep in mind that not all people feel the same
about things.
Don't
Be Pushy. If
you are interested in “partying” with
someone let him or her know in an inviting way.
If they are interested, they will respond
positively. If they are not and say “No, thank
you,” do not ask WHY. No amount of sweet talk
or coercion on your part will change their mind
and will probably work against you. Everyone has
the right to say “NO” at all times, to
anyone, without explanation. Do not ever forget
that.
Couples:
Deal with Jealousy Head-On!
It’s a normal, human reaction. Learn what
triggers jealousy in yourself and in your
partner. Then work things out. This may mean
modifying certain activities, curtailing others
or finding new means of sexual expression. Take
time to stroke your partner’s ego. Touch bases
with each other often, so that you both feel
secure. Always arrive together. Honor any and
all prior understandings. Always leave together.
Your relationship together is not worth risking
for the Lifestyle.
Attending
as a Single. If
you are a man or woman attending the party solo,
it is important to be sensitive to and
respectful of the relationship that a couple has
with each other. Keep relationships friendly and
pleasant. Always propose never impose! “No
still means No.”
Respond
to All Invitations.
RSVP
means please reply to the invitation. It does
NOT mean reply only if you plan to attend. The
most frustrating part of hosting, be it a party,
a group or another couple, is people who are
discourteous enough to not respond, PERIOD. Good
etiquette and good social courtesy DEMANDS you
respond, by either calling or writing to say YES
or NO.
Go
Prepared. Take
whatever you personally are going to need with
you. Carry a small overnight bag for lingerie or
robe, hairbrush, comb, toothbrush, cologne,
intimate cleansing articles, condoms, etc. If
you have previously been invited to stay over,
sleeping bags or blankets and pillows are
necessities.
Cleanliness.
Nothing
turns a person off faster and more effectively
than an unclean body or bad breath. Even if you
shower and perfume yourself before you leave
home it is always a good idea to freshen up
again when you arrive at your destination. It is
amazing what driving somewhere, stopping for a
bite, or whatever, did do or rather UNDO.
Practice
Safer Sex. It
is up to us to protect ourselves as well as our
partners. With the present concern over sexually
transmitted diseases such as syphilis,
gonorrhea, AIDS, yeast infection, etc., the use
of condoms should not offend anybody. Anyone not
willing to take this precaution is acting
selfishly and irresponsibly. You are not being
accused of being unclean. Simply someone wishes
to be responsible and provide you both with
protection.
Alcohol
and Drugs. Most
of us do not use drugs, although some of us
drink socially. At times, a few drinks are nice
to help you “relax.” Over-indulging may
hamper your physical abilities, as well as
offend or turn other people off to you. If you
have to over indulge in order to participate,
you are involved in the wrong lifestyle.
Absolutely NO ILLEGAL DRUGS are permitted at our
parties. If you are found to be using any type
of illegal substance at the parties, you will be
asked to leave and your membership to the club
will be revoked!
Enjoy
Yourself. Most
important, have a good time, act out your
fantasies, explore your own sexuality and enjoy
everything this lifestyle has to offer with
enthusiasm, laughter, and a positive attitude.
I
am married and swing without my wives/husband
consent. Is this club for me?
Currently,
85 % of the Males and 42 % of the Females (Note
that this does NOT include couples!!!)who are
members of the club are married, or have a
'significant other', and they do not know about
their involvement within our group.
Why
do I/We have to submit pictures of ourselves as
well as an application to attend a party?
This
is the single-most asked question of people who
want to attend our parties. The Mandingo Club
prides itself in maintaining a membership base
that includes professionals from all walks of
life-- Athletes, Entertainers, Lawyers, Doctors,
and the list goes on. Because this is the
internet, and there are many individuals out
there who are so infatuated with playing games,
there are certain measures we must take in order
to weed out those who are serious about the
lifestyle, and those that are merely online to
have an adventure at the expense of others. As
all of our current members can attest to, they
are much more comfortable knowing that those
whom they are partying with have been
pre-screened and selected in a manner that most
suites the collective interests of this private
club. Remember, The Mandingo Club is EXCLUSIVE
and not INCLUSIVE. The information you
provide in your application is kept confidential
and is never shared with any third parties. We
hope this answers your question in a brief and
concise manner.
We
are/I am a beginner(s) in the Lifestyle, is this
club for us?
There
isn't a correct answer for this question. You
must take this into consideration- Everybody who
is in this lifestyle began somewhere. Whether it
was at a private party, a special occasion that
just happened, or whether it was a planned event
that led them to enjoy the lifestyle, there was
a moment in time where the Swing Lifestyle was
foreign to all of us. If you are new to the
Swing Lifestyle, we welcome you with open arms
and are more than willing to help you in your
transition into a more enjoyable way of
expressing your sexuality insofar as you are
open-minded and willing to learn about the
lifestyle.
We
are/ I am not quite ready to attend a Swing
Party, and would rather a smaller more private
intimate affair.
We
understand that certain people like to take
things one step at a time and eventually work up
to feeling comfortable with attending a swing
party with 20-30 other individuals/couples. It
is our belief that every person should take
things at their own pace and sometimes that
means being in a more intimate setting. We do
host intimate affairs in which we try to
accommodate the needs of the individuals.
We/
I don't feel comfortable with having pictures of
us/me taken while engaged in Swing Activities.
All
of our swing parties are videotaped/photographed
by only one individual who is most likely the
club founder. In this lifestyle, more often than
not, people tend to be not only active Swingers,
but exhibitionists as well. The pictures and
video from parties is ONLY available to group
members in the password-protected members area-
nowhere else. [UPDATE July 2005] Because of NEW
Federal Laws ( 18 U.S.C 2257) ALL participants
must sign a model release and provide the two
required IDs. There are NO exceptions! Those
that party with us enjoy being able to live out
their fantasies in a discreet fashion, such that
our pictures and video remain private. That
being said, we prefer taking wide-angle shots
wherein you can see the core of the action and
thus don't have to worry about your identity.
Those that have identifying marks, such as
tattoos, we do edit those out so as to remain
anonymous. We hope that this answers this
question for you as much as possible.
What
is the typical setting at one of The Mandingo
Club Parties?
We
take great pride in putting together our parties
and feel that our parties are the proper
environment for people that are seeking to
expand on their sexual escapades to live them
out with others. While our parties do not have a
set structure in terms of how things happen at
the parties, those that party with us enjoy the
ambiance at our parties. The environment begins
to liven up the moment you arrive at the party.
Enjoying alcoholic and non-alcoholic libations
while socializing with everyone at the party,
setting the mood and tone for an evening not
soon to be forgotten. As the evening progresses,
heavy sexual overtones permeate the environment
and thus, after all that, the real fun begins.
We/I
am in another state, how can We/I attend a
Mandingo Club Swing Party in my area?
[For
your own safety and proper enjoyment of the
Interracial Lifestyle, be aware that there have
been multiple Mandingo Clubs setting up across
the country. They are NOT a part of the ACTUAL
Mandingo Club! For your enjoyment, please ONLY
party with the below listed Mandingo Club
chapters!]
The
Southern California Mandingo Club and The NYC
Mandingo Club are the Flagships of The Mandingo
Club©. The Mandingo Club currently has chapters
in California/Las Vegas, New York/ New Jersey,
and Atlanta. The Atlanta Mandingo Club is the
chapter that hosts parties in the surrounding
areas including Florida, South Carolina, North
Carolina, DC, Tennessee and Alabama.
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